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diaryland
2004-10-04, 6:48 p.m.

Have you ever realized something? Realized it in the all-knowing way that you know it's a secret you can't tell? Something more to swallow, I'll take some more of that. Tie it up pretty with some vodka and I need some more of that.

If you make me bleed, I'm going to leave. If you make me feel, I'm going to leave. If you make me dream, I'm going to leave. Do you get it now?

I'm a girl, just a girl. Stumbling. They call me the hustler and 500 is my out. Don't scratch, now's not the time.

Just scratch in life. Screw it all up. Like you already have. All you've given to me I've fucked right up.

So let's dance:

Step 1, I step away from you. Step 2 brings you right back to me. Do you get it now? I'm taking on step 3.

My running shoes are by the door. I haven't put them on yet but it's not too far. Just a couple feet. I'm getting stuck here knowing I can leave.

Walk away. Walk on. Listen to another u2 song. The one we danced to, under the stars, in the middle of the street. Singing. At the top of our lungs, no cares. It's just you and me. The world wasn't there.

So let's dance:

Step 1, I take away from you. Step 2, brings you right back to me. Step 3, I smile prettily. Step 4, keeps you coming back for more. And by step 5 I realize....

If you make me bleed, I'm going to leave. If you make me feel, I'm going to leave. If you make me dream, I'm going to leave. Do you get it now?

I'll take a little of that. I'll take some more if it stings. I'm not the girl who keeps smiling. I'm not the girl who keeps trying. I'm not the girl who keeps lying. I'm the one that leaves.