The rain moves around the silence I am. My thoughts scream. The photographs glare at me. Times when we were happy. "For what it's worth, it was worth all the while." Music soft. Was it always that soft? The lyrics catch me. I see years from now unfolding. I don't want to know what they hold. But it's like a book I've already read. Where the end catches you with something you don't expect.

The song changes as I turn in the darkness towards the rain. "By the way..." Tears come, unwelcome.

I walked down a street of a city I did not know. It was beautiful, one of the most beautiful in the world. And with all these little ironicies that brought me here in tears, I have to smile. For the broken green glass in the street. For the man on the corner with the tired eyes and shakes from the cold. For the cafe with the local music. It almost felt like home.

So I changed the song. I went thru the motions. "I picked you out I shook you up and turned you around. Turned you into someone new."

I will never be the same again. Thank you for that. Did I mention I hate you sometimes? I want to end this. But I don't think I can say goodbye to you. Not when the book isn't finished. Not yet. Because even though I've read it before, I'm not done yet. Not this time.